"....try to love the questions themselves like locked rooms and like books that are written in a very foreign tongue. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answer."

Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet

Tuesday, April 22, 2014

10 things I've learned so far

1) Daylight is a nice time of the day. 

2) My house is a very peaceful place in the middle of the day.  Peaceful to the point of looking somewhat post-apocalyptic.  The dog looks like road kill, asleep.  The cat is stretched out on the bed, extravagantly relaxed, and asleep.  Occasionally my son comes home from work, watches an episode of something on his computer, and stretches out on the sofa, asleep.  Sometimes even my hard working husband slips home and takes a quick nap between clients.  Who knew???  It's siesta time, and no one sent me the memo... until this week.

3)  Narcotics are good for pain.  They are good for sleeping.  (See #2 above).  They are excellent for feeling very very peaceful. 

4)  Narcotics are not so good for the digestive system.  Narcotics suppress the appetite, and the bowels, and everything in between.

5)  Narcotics are not a good way to come up with creative ideas.  (My brilliant tagline for a constipation remedy came to me in a blinding vision around Day 3:  "Choosing to defeat social candy")  (I know.  WTF.)

6)  There are some good books out there.  Currently in the middle of The Goldfinch, by Donna Tartt.  A long mother, but super good and an excellent way to fade in and out of reality. 

7)  Walking: good.

8)  Eating: good.

9) If you lose a body part to cancer, it's much more healthy to say "I've gained a cancer free body" than "I've lost a body part."

10)  There can actually be a point, or I think I'm seeing that possibility, where one can be awake and not be tired and longing for the next nap.  I think that's called being... relaxed?  rested enough?  Haven't felt this way for a long long time.  I'm exploring the idea and will get back to you on this.

More later.

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